Burned out without booze? You may have an “introvert hangover”

A few years ago, I was scheduled to present an important keynote in Canada—one of my first large speaking opportunities. It came after weeks of travel, intensive client work, and nonstop video editing. In short, I was burned out before I even stepped onstage.

After rushing to the venue from my international flight, I stood in the green room, my hands sweaty from nerves. I hadn’t slept well in days while juggling a massive client fire, and though I had rehearsed the talk several times, I was still consumed with thoughts like “What if it all falls apart?” When I walked onstage, I realized I’d forgotten to bring the clicker for the slides. I had to greet the audience and then casually return offstage to get it. About five slides in, I felt an unpleasant energy change.

Standing on that massive stage under intense spotlights, I had a severe panic attack. I felt like my heart stopped, and I couldn’t breathe, but somehow I finished the talk—although I remember very little about it. The next couple of days were a blur as I hid in my hotel room, experiencing a total system crash. I was overwhelmed and depleted, going through what’s known as an introvert hangover.

Michelle Risser, a licensed clinical social worker, explains that this occurs when an introvert feels drained after extensive socializing. Contrary to popular belief, introverts can be great at socializing. But once they’re spent, they often suffer a “hangover” unrelated to alcohol and requiring recovery.

The need to recharge your social battery is backed by science. The neurotransmitter dopamine, also known as the “feel-good” hormone, influences the brain’s reward centers, motivating us by creating pleasurable feelings when we anticipate enjoyable activities. Introverts’ brains are more responsive to dopamine, requiring much less of it to trigger a big response. In fact, too much dopamine makes introverts feel overstimulated and exhausted, prompting them to retreat from noise and crowds.

To add to this, introverts gain more motivation from the neurotransmitter acetylcholine. Similar to dopamine, this chemical activates feelings of pleasure, but it’s triggered when we engage in self-reflection. This reaction helps explain why introverts often prefer quieter, solitary activities that allow them to recharge and focus inward.

In my early twenties, I spent quite some time in a few fun, dark, and dirty bars and occasionally drank a bit too much. The next day, I felt completely exhausted, groggy, and gross. These days, I don’t drink at all, but I still remember that “run over by an eighteen-wheeler” feeling of being completely wrecked.

What does this have to do with introverts and our energy levels? Even though an introvert hangover has nothing to do with alcohol or drugs, it is a real phenomenon linked to physical and mental exhaustion after extended social engagement. The effects of an introvert hangover last until the person has spent enough time alone to recharge their social battery and regain their energy. During this recovery period, it’s essential for introverts to relax in solitude, allowing themselves to restore their system’s equilibrium.

If you experience several of the following symptoms during or after extended socializing, there’s a high chance you’re suffering from an introvert hangover:

• Feeling drained and exhausted
• Difficulty sleeping
• Feeling overstimulated
• Becoming easily irritated
• Unable to concentrate
• Desperately needing alone time
• Continual headaches
• Body aches and tension
• Inability to get motivated to work

In addition to this list, there are three clear signs of an introvert hangover. First, there’s social fatigue: feeling extremely tired after extended socializing. Imagine attending a party and talking to many people for hours. Afterward, you don’t just feel tired; you feel completely worn out.

Second, there’s mental exhaustion, when your brain feels like it’s been working overtime. You may struggle to think clearly or focus, and even the simplest tasks can seem like a big deal.

Third, there’s physical exhaustion, when you’re so drained it feels like you can’t take another step. You might feel like you’re drowning or need to lie down, even if you haven’t done anything physically demanding, and it’s impossible to motivate yourself for work or basic activities.

You’ve probably heard of sleep hygiene: the healthy habits that promote a good night’s sleep, like putting away your phone or keeping electronics out of your bedroom. For example, going to bed at the same time every night and avoiding caffeine late in the day can help you sleep better and wake up feeling more rested. Developing good sleep habits leads to improved rest and overall well-being.

Energy hygiene refers to managing your social energy. Just as sleep hygiene helps you sleep well, energy hygiene helps you preserve and recharge your energy levels. By focusing on your energy hygiene, you can avoid feeling drained and empty after social interactions. Think of it like taking regular pit stops during a long drive to refuel. Without these breaks, you risk running out of gas and finding yourself stranded on a deserted, dusty highway with no energy to keep going.

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Javadoodles, an animator and artist with over three milion social media followers, has found her own way to recharge. “Being an introvert has absolutely benefited me in every aspect of my life—especially in a creative sense,” she told me. “I need to be alone in my space, not distracted, and away from people. People might think that’s weird, but I don’t care. It allows me the opportunity to cultivate the best creative space for myself possible at any given time, whether it’s radio silence, lighting preferences, listening to a podcast or music, etc. It’s not just a preference. It’s a need.”

As an introvert in the wild, you have social batteries that will drain over time, requiring you to practice energy hygiene. Certain factors can deplete your energy faster than others. While not every person you interact with will drain you, those who are consistently negative, complaining, or critical can leave you mentally exhausted. Small talk, especially with strangers, can also take its toll, as can high-pressure environments with work colleagues. Introverts may prefer smaller groups or one-on-one interactions, as large groups can feel overwhelming due to the noise and complex dynamics. Long periods of socializing, like a weeklong conference, can feel far more draining than shorter events. Opting for a few smaller gatherings with ample breaks between them can make the experience more doable.

Practicing sustainable energy-conserving habits is key to proper energy hygiene. Many introverts push through exhaustion, continuing to socialize while feeling sapped. I know how easy it is to ignore your limits, especially with a demanding career. However, the more stressful your life, the more important it is to develop replenishing strategies. If you don’t take time to recharge, you can quickly burn out. Once you’re burned out, it’s hard to be productive or creative, and you may struggle to engage with others or to put your best foot forward. Good energy hygiene helps keep your social batteries charged.

You may face resistance to the idea of alone time from extroverts you know. But they also need to recharge, and they do so by socializing. An extrovert might combat extrovert burnout with Friday night plans, a Saturday in the park, Sunday brunch with friends, and a recurring Sunday night mixer. Similarly, introverts deserve a proper energy refill—which may be an entire weekend spent alone, reading, watching TV, or listening to podcasts while doing puzzles.

Just like a traditional hangover, ignoring the need to rest only worsens an introvert hangover. Continuing to interact without taking a break will intensify the exhaustion. You’ll feel increasingly drained until you take the time to recharge.